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Thursday, August 13, 2020

What if Some Kids Are Better Off at Home?

For parents like me, the pandemic has come with a revelation: For our children, school was torture.


In the early morning hours of Monday, March 9, I was locked in battle with my oldest son, Izac, then a freshman in high school, over what felt like his one-billionth request to skip his 7 a.m. physical education class. He said he was tired and anxious and begged for a break. I told him that when you commit to something, you show up. End of story. And so off he went to school, bleary-eyed and resentful.
Four days later, all of my kids were home, with schools closed “out of an abundance of caution” to prevent the spread of Covid-19. Before long, the morning rush to get to class on time felt like a distant memory. The pandemic changed everything.
One difference that became clear within a few weeks of lockdown: My son was happy.
Izac, my lanky, serious-faced 15-year-old who runs cross-country and listens to Kendrick Lamar, has A.D.H.D. He’s never been disruptive — he’s more the dreamy, nose-in-a-book type who likes a calm environment and a limited schedule. Sadly, he’s rarely had that. But while my husband and I knew the pressure of a traditional school day could be challenging for him, we didn’t realize exactly how miserable he was...

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